Well, Lent is here! Wasn’t it just Christmas? As I was thinking about Ash Wednesday and this reflection, I remembered a reflection I wrote a few years ago that I loved, that continues to say exactly how I feel about this special day and the Lenten Season that it unfolds. And so rather than try to say something new this year, I will let these words from five years ago do the talking.
The older I get, the more I notice how fast time goes by. Life get’s so busy, and before we know it, a year has gone by. Also, the older I get, the more and more I think about my own mortality. You see the stories in the news about people being killed, and it makes you think. And then I start to see people my age or not too much older than me passing away, and it starts to hit home. I start thinking more about the inevitable, not in fear, but more along the lines of ‘Am I ready?’
If God were to come calling this very instant, would my soul be in the state it needs to be in? Do I carry stains or burdens on my heart that offend God, and that might prevent me from eternal life with Him? Recently, in the United States, the President gave his State of the Union Address, an annual speech he gives about the current state of the country, the good and bad from last year, and his thoughts and plans for the coming year. Similarly, in a few weeks, the president of the company I work for will give his State of the Company Address, which outlines the current state of the company, and the plans and theme for the coming year.
Well, today kicks off our period of annual reflection – not of the union or any other country, not for our workplace, but of our heart. What is the state of your heart?
This is actually what Ash Wednesday and Lent is all about. Today we think about our own mortality, Remembering that we are dust, and to dust we shall return. – Gen 3:19.
We are going to die, every single one of us. Are we ready? Is our soul prepared? What is the state of your heart? We use Lent as that training period to get us ready for the big race. We use Lent as that time to wash all the filth and grime from ourselves, much like how we wash the filth and grime from our cars this time of year, after a long hard winter.
We all know that Lent is a time of extra prayer, fasting, charity and repentance, but it’s also a time for joy and reflection. We reflect about the previous year, we joyfully look forward to a better relationship with Christ in the coming year, and we train ourselves again on how to be good Christians in a not so good world. We inflict discipline in our lives through more prayer, fasting and charity, with the intent that we become better people. And we reflect on the state of our heart and ask for God’s forgiveness.
Today’s readings cover all of this, and among my favorite readings in the entire bible is todays psalm, Psalm 51– The Miserere: Kings David’s Prayer of Repentance. I love King David. He’s one of my favorite people in the Bible because he was a simple guy, and ordinary person like most of us. He was a man after God’s own heart, and he was always the underdog, the long shot. He had unbelievable trust and faith in God and through God’s grace he did some great things. But he was also a sinner, just like the rest of us. He messed up, and put his selfish desires before God, like the rest of us. He lusted after and had an affair with another mans wife, and then he had that man killed. And when the prophet Nathan called him out, he surrendered to God and wrote this psalm of repentance.
He opened his heart up to God and asked for his forgiveness. David was not without consequence for his actions, but God did forgive him and poured His grace out to David. The story of David’s repentance is a model we all need to follow. God loves us as much as He loved David; we are all children after God’s own heart if we have the faith and trust and love of God that David had.
And you can look to the other readings and see the same theme – it’s all about our heart. As the prophet Joel said,
Even now, says the LORD, return to me with your whole heart, with fasting, and weeping, and mourning; Rend your hearts, not your garments, and return to the LORD, your God.
We need to examine our hearts, our conscience, and in true sincerity and sacrifice – return to God. I know for a lot of us, Confession is not a regular thing. I know it is difficult to tell our deepest, darkest sins to someone else whom we do not know. But remember, you are not talking to the priest during confession – you are talking to Christ through the priest, who is in persona Christi. And Christ already knows your secrets, He knows what you have done, so there’s really no hiding it. There’s nothing to be afraid of, and remember, wherever two or more are gathered in Christ’s name, He is there. Matthew 18:20. This is why we must go to Confession, it’s the only way we truly receive God’s forgiveness and grace. And there is not a better time to repent than Lent. Embrace the joy and grace of this sacrament, and as St. Paul writes to the Corinthians today:
We implore you on behalf of Christ, be reconciled to God.
In looking at the state of your heart though, the only way it truly can be opened to Christ is through regular prayer, fasting, and charity to others. Lent is a time to turn it up. But when doing these things, we need to examine where our heart is, and whether we are doing these for the glory of God, or for ourselves. Are we doing these things for God? Or our we doing them for our own glory and credit? Jesus states in todays Gospel where our hearts should be:
…But when you give alms, do not let your left hand know what your right is doing, so that your almsgiving may be secret. And your Father who sees in secret will repay you.
…But when you pray, go to your inner room, close the door, and pray to your Father in secret. And your Father who sees in secret will repay you.
…But when you fast, anoint your head and wash your face, so that you may not appear to be fasting, except to your Father who is hidden. And your Father who sees what is hidden will repay you.
God sees into our mind and soul and knows where our true heart lies. He knows what our intent and motivation is. What we get out of Lent is what we put into to it. So if we just go through the motions or we are consumed with putting up a front and portraying how holy, generous and charitable we are, then our Lent may not be that fruitful for our soul. But if we truly examine our heart, and spend time reflecting on God’s love and our love for God, and work to improve ourselves and praise Jesus through prayer, sacrifice and love of one another, then our Lent can be life changing.
No matter what we’ve done or who we are, we can open up our hearts to Christ and build a better relationship with Him. Listen to God, and listen to the promptings of the Holy Spirit. So for this Lent, I am challenging myself and all of you, let’s examine our heart, reflect upon where we’ve been, talk to God about where we are going, and strive to be children after God’s own heart.
I leave you with this prayer of repentance, taken directly from Psalm 51. Say this everyday, and remember that we never know that day that we will return to dust, so we must always be looking at the state of our heart.
Have mercy on me, O God, in your goodness;
For I acknowledge my offense,
and my sin is before me always.
Against you only have I sinned,
and done what is evil in your sight.
A clean heart create for me, O God,
and a steadfast spirit renew within me.
Give me back the joy of your salvation,
and a willing spirit sustain in me.
Amen.
