While I wake up to meeting the baker dropping freshly baked bread at my doorstep every morning as I head to the gym, I never realised how essential bread was to my diet until I left home! While my state thanks to the Portuguese influence begin their day with a form of bread called “pao” buttered and dipped either in a hot cup of tea or a plate of gravy vegetables or pulses!
While I would have to hunt and purchase packet stored sliced sandwich bread for my breakfast and meals at other places, I knew I would miss home for just the sound of the bakers horn and his soft and tasty bread – it is a very Goan feeling! ( as much as our afternoon naps are )
When I left home in 2019 , I realised how much I craved bread even more and would make it a point to frequent the gorgeous French inspired cafes after Sunday mass for a croissant and coffee! The urge to have a light dinner was fulfilled by just a bread dipped into a curry or a savoury chicken masala.
This similar longing and yearning hit me when I had to skip sunday mass during days of pandemic! I longed to visit the church, sing aloud along the choir and say my prayers in unison with so many other faithful.. I longed to kneel and list to God how my week was and what I was hopeful for the new one!
I absolutely missed the receiving the bread of life and getting my inner strength! Yes, the pandemic and online mass enabled me to be safe and healthy but also got me extremely distracted and lazy! While some days (most) I sat in my pyjamas, some Sundays I would increase the play speed by 2x so i could finish with it and move to the chores I had pending! I was bored and did not pay head much to the sermon and some days skipped parts if the priest spoke for longer than 7 minutes.
Yes, I wasnt the best Sunday behavior at online mass. It didnt make me feel like I received the Lord and worse I constantly did it out of not feeling guilty or skipping an obligation! however in 2021 when churches did re open and I had the oppurtunity to sit in one for lent last year, I would travel 30kms by public transport in the Indian heat for a Sunday mass! I just could not miss it.
I am the bread of life.
I long for that bread every day and sundays I run to get my share in the feast of the Lord! While now days I am tagging with my ever enthusiastic dad, who despite his surgery and chemo rounds, never skips being on time to church for sunday 8 am celebration, I did realise how addicted we are all to the bread of life and need it to sustain our faith and satisfy our hunger!
Let us starve our lives of sin to be filled with the bread of life !every day every sunday …
PRAYER
Thank you Lord,for guiding me and helping me be faithful! Teach me be a better faithfilled human at every occasion I get to receive this eternal food!
Amen
