I love this Gospel reading today. It is my favorite in the entire Bible because it truly resonates with me in that I was, and many times still am, a Doubting Thomas. For the longest time, really up until just a few years ago, I wanted proof that everything in the Bible, including Christ’s life and resurrection happened. I wanted definitive evidence, proving everything, from finding fragments of Noah’s Ark on a mountaintop in Turkey, to finding where and how the Red Sea could have possibly been parted, and my personal favorite – the Shroud of Turin. Was this really the burial shroud Christ was buried in and that he was resurrected in? If they could just prove that any of these things were real, and we had indisputable evidence, I would believe. I needed to see it. I needed to touch it.
There were times growing up where my Mom called me her Doubting Thomas. I love science, and I love facts, and so I wanted to see proof. But I eventually came to realize that God had been showing me proof for many years, I just failed to see it. He is all around us. Christ is real and He is in our hearts, our flesh and blood because He became flesh and blood and sacrificed that blood for us. By doing that, God and humanity became one again. We became whole.
I’ve only begun to examine the tip of the iceberg on this, and sometimes I am still that Doubting Thomas. We all are. Many times we still doubt Christ’s presence and that He is real, and His ability to change our lives. We get so caught up in the world today and our everyday lives that we fail to believe, and we forget the signs and proof that we’ve seen in the past, and we seek more proof from God. We fail to believe at times.
But this story of Thomas is much deeper than simply “believing because we have seen.” Thomas was a great apostle and is a great saint, but he served a purpose here in John’s Gospel – a purpose that has really helped to define our faith. This story of the resurrected Christ appearing to the disciples and this dialog and interaction with Thomas demonstrates how we need to approach and believe in Christ.
Christ is God in human form. He is God that the disciples were able to hug, and laugh with, and see, and touch. And so when Christ asked Thomas to touch His hands and touch His side, it was not only to prove to Thomas that the person in front of him was the resurrected Christ, but it was also to offer proof to future Christians including us today, that Jesus is real, that He is God in the flesh. And as Saint John writes in his first letter today,
“This is the one who came through water and blood, Jesus Christ, not by water alone, but by water and blood.”
He came through water and blood. And blood. He was a real person, a real body that shed blood and died for us. And so by telling Thomas to touch Him, Christ is telling us also that He is God that we can see and be touch, and most importantly that we can consume and come into communion with, and become one.
When Thomas does this, and truly sees and feels our Lord in the flesh, he exclaims “My Lord and my God!”
This was a special grace Thomas received, and we can experience the same exact thing every day. We can see and feel and consume Christ every day at Mass in the form of the Eucharist. He may not look the same, but it is the same experience. We receive the same grace and witness Christ’s existence every time we go to Mass. And when we encounter the Lord in the Eucharist, that is how we should greet Him every time – “My Lord and my God.” Thomas taught us this.
But we have to believe. We have to believe that bread and that wine is Christ, that it is the Lord our God and all His grace and knowledge and understanding. We must believe – without seeing. That is the second lesson from the Gospel today, that while it IS Christ in front of us in the Eucharist at Mass, and in the monstrance at Adoration, we have to believe that, without seeing. We were not there at the Last Supper. We were not there at the crucifixion or when they laid Him in the tomb. We did not see Jesus rise from the dead, and we did not see Him appear to Thomas.
All we have to go on is what the disciples have to tell us and that great people like Saint John wrote down in His Gospel. We didn’t see any of this, but we have their words and the words and experiences of all the Saints since then to tell us that, yes, Christ is real, and it did happen that way. As Catholics, we know that Christ is there in front of us because it is too perfect. The Church teachings, the tradition and liturgy, and the Sacred Scripture are perfect. The Catholic faith is perfect. We as people are not perfect, and unfortunately we mess things up from time to time and often give things including the Church a bad name and reputation.
But our faith is perfect, every aspect spawned from the Father, and the Son, and the Holy Spirit. This is our proof. That despite all the trials and tribulations, our faith and the Catholic Church has stood for 2000 years. Something must be right about this. We must be on to something. This is our evidence, that Christ is real, and that amidst all the evils of this world and all that we have been confronted with as Christians and as Catholics, we continue to persevere.
But we have to listen to Jesus as he talks to Thomas today, that we have to believe, even though we may not see. We have to know, even though we may not understand. We have to trust, even in times of uncertainty. And we have no reason to doubt that Christ is there in front of us at Mass, and that he becomes part of us when we consume Him at communion, because the proof is there. It’s all around us. It’s been written down and passed on over the ages, from people named Peter, and Paul and John and the Saints and holy men and women ever since. And it’s in the story about Thomas. John was there. He saw it. There’s no doubting.
