Uncertainty. Isolation. Hurt.
This is where we find people in each of the readings today.
Uncertainty
After Jesus’ death, society was in turmoil. Not only political turmoil, but turmoil and uncertainty with who exactly Jesus was. They just crucified Him for saying He is God, but then He rose from the dead. His body was not in His tomb. They wondered, ‘Did he really rise from the dead? Or did one of His disciples just steal the body to make it look like He did?’
But then there were reports of Jesus appearing to different people in different locations. And then the healings began. Peter telling a lame man to get up and walk, other Apostles curing the sick and removing unclean spirits, all in the name of Jesus Christ. People started to believe. People began to hope.
So much uncertainty surrounding what was happening. People were polarized – those that believed, those that were angry feeling that this was all an elaborate hoax. And everyone, else, confused and somewhere in-between.
How many times have we found ourselves shrouded by uncertainty in our lives due to the circumstances surrounding us – circumstances caused by turmoil – often beyond our control? One time that stands out to me is September 11, 2001 and the days and weeks thereafter. The uncertainty of this new world thrust upon us was overwhelming.
Or perhaps it’s the loss of a job, or the loss of a loved one. Whatever it may be, it literally shatters your life and routine.
But just as Jesus came to the people through His Apostles, he comes to us through modern day apostles, through those who we gather together with in times of uncertainty. Our families, our friends, and our community. Jesus comes to us in the uncertainty.
Isolation
Here we have John. Many years in the future, exiled to the island of Patmos for being an Apostle of Christ. The other Apostles – martyred. John was isolated and His life spared. Why? Well, for one, he did a lot of writing and documenting of Jesus’ life and teachings for the generations to come. And through this isolation, Jesus came to him and showed him a vision – a revealing of the future – of what was to come, of future of what is. John documented this in the Book of Revelation.
I’m sure there is much more theology about this that is bigger than I, but Jesus came to John in His isolation. Johns years of evangelization and witness to Jesus, and then His years of isolation and the difficulties that surely resulted prepared Him for what was to come – His encounter with Christ and His Revelation of what was to come, what is, and what will be.
How many times have we found ourselves in isolation, thinking that God is not with us, wondering why we have been forsaken? Even Jesus lamented this while on the Cross.
I think of those in the throes of addiction. The darkness and pit of despair they find themselves in, unable to control your urges, anxiety leading to the next hit of whatever your vice is. The hate of that vice and the emptiness you feel after its effects wear off, which leads to more anxiety, which leads to more of the vice. Its and endless spiral into darkness and isolation.
Or I think of those who deal with depression, bullying and hate, or internal conflictions about who they are as a person, who society wants them to be verses who they know they should be. Wondering why God created them this way or allows them to feel certain desires. Why does God allow them to have certain feelings, or wonder why they should go on living because the mental anguish and pain is just too much.
Often in these situations, we question whether or not there really is a God. We don’t know what John felt during His exile, but we are all exiled and isolated in some way.
But just as Jesus came to John, He comes to us in our isolation as well.
Do we recognize him in these times of isolation? Or do we turn away?
Hurt
This is where we find Thomas today. He is hurting. Not physically per se, though through His emotional hurt of Jesus’ death I’m sure it had its physical effects. I envision him wandering the city. Not eating, not sleeping. He’s withdrawn from his friends, dealing with this on his own. He wasn’t there when Jesus appeared to the rest of the disciples the first time. And so, they told him about it and he’s like, ‘yeah right. whatever. I don’t believe it.’ We all know the Doubting Thomas reputation.
But Thomas was likely an introvert and a very analytical person. He was hurting, just like the rest of them, but this is how we dealt with the hurt. He withdrew. He needed physical evidence to believe. Thomas was really a microcosm of these three states – uncertainty, isolation and hurt.
But it was this hurt that really affected him. He was hurt, not only that his beloved friend was killed, but he was hurt that Jesus wasn’t, or at least in his view, the Savior He claimed to be. He was hurt that Jesus’ destiny was never fulfilled, at least so he thought.
I think of the mother and father in shock over losing a child. A child who dies at a young age. Not only is it a complete shock, but the parent’s feel unimaginable hurt. Their child will never live to experience life, have a family of their own, or reach the vision that they had for them.
We don’t see the big picture in these situations. We don’t see any picture at all. We are just mentally and physically hurting.
We’ve all been in this situation of hurt at one time or another. Jesus literally came to Thomas and showed him the physical evidence. He had Thomas touch His wounds. It’s through our faith in this very act that we are blessed. It’s through our faith without having seen that Jesus comes to us in our own times of hurt, and touches our own wounds, and comforts us.
Jesus has touched my wounds multiple times when I have been at my weakest, because I had no other place to turn, and I finally submitted to pure faith in Him.
How has He comforted you when you’ve been hurting?
I read something in another devotional today that I think ties this all together, where Jesus says to us:
My Power flows most freely into weak ones aware of their need for me.
This is Divine Mercy, where if we have faith in Him and His Resurrection, Jesus comes to us most powerfully in our weakest moments – in the uncertainty, the isolation, and the times of hurt. When we are in these times and we have the awareness that we need Him and no one else can help us – He comes to us. It’s amazing to witness and experience.
His Mercy flows freely.
