Regret is the emotion of wishing one had made a different decision in the past, because the consequences of the decision one did make were unfavorable.
We all feel this at one time or another in our lives, do we not? The looking back over one’s life, either in the short term or looking back years before, and feeling despondent over choices we made. Particularly if the outcome of those choices did not manifest in the ways we had hoped. At least we often BELIEVE that things would have turned out better had we acted and chose differently. And more to the point is that we each can respond differently to those feelings of regret. If we allow it to, regret can become all encompassing such that it effects our abilities to move on in our lives. Feelings that we messed up our lives in the past and now it is not worth living that life out in whatever direction it has taken us.
One of my regrets personally was my decision, when my children were young, to sing in our parish choir. I had often sung at churches I belonged to and really enjoyed it…not sure the congregants always enjoyed my efforts but, hey, I worked cheap. I sang in choir because it was something that I enjoyed doing. ME…MYSELF. Get where I am going? This was fine when I was single, or at least before Elise and I had children. But once the kids came along MY choice put burdens on my JEWISH wife. She had to try to explain to our children what was going on during mass while their CATHOLIC Father was off singing in choir. Not able to provide for them the Catholic teaching that they needed. I would have changed this choice if I could. But I can’t. I can only move forward.
In today’s first reading from the first book of Maccabees we see the Greek King, Antiochus, despondent because his armies have lost in their attempts to overthrow the wealthy Persian city of Elymias. In addition, Antiochus’ army has been routed by the Israelites led by Judah Maccabees and forced to flee back to Persia. Antiochus cannot understand why this has happened to him. He is a descendent of Alexander the Great and he has let his people down, not living up to expectations of his rule.
But he then recalls the destruction he had inflicted on the Jews years earlier when he destroyed their temples and forced them to relinquish their religious practices in favor of worshipping the pagan gods of the Greeks. He regrets his choices and the effects. He grows deeper into depression and sorrow, eventually leading to his death in a state of extreme grief. Judah Maccabees leads the Jews to eventual victory of the Greeks and restores the temple to its former glory. The celebration of Hannukah stems from this victory and the eight days of rejoicing that followed the rededication of the temple.
How do we respond to regret? Do we let our past consume us and darken our lives? Or do we see the hope that life holds from beginning to end, regardless of the twists and turns it takes. As Christians we hold that hope in the person of the RISEN Christ. Jesus endured incredible suffering and gave up His life so that we could live. Matthew and Zacchaeus were tax collectors who had stolen from their people. They were hated and despised. But Christ called them both out of their sin. Out of their regret. Called them to follow Him.
In the Gospel today from Luke, Jesus is engaging in the “Sport” of Arguing Torah with the Sadducees. A common practice even today among rabbinic students. The Sadducees did not believe that there was a resurrection. And, therefore, they believed that the only life we had was the present one. They give Jesus a ridiculous scenario based on the Levirate Marriage ritual engaged in at the time where a brother must marry his brother’s widow if they are childless so that the brother could Father a child and continue his brother’s bloodline. The Sadducees propose that there were 7 brothers who die childless after each marries his brother’s widow. The Sadducees want to know whose wife the widow will be in the afterlife. Jesus informs them that there is no marriage in heaven for we will be like angels.
Without the belief in a resurrection, the Sadducees have no hope. This life is all they get and any “mistakes” they make will live with them until their deaths. But Jesus put an end to that misery. To that sense of hopelessness. We have our relationship with Him in THIS life as well as the next. We are children of the resurrection in this, the Messianic, age.
Yes, I wished I sat with my children in the pew all those years ago while they were growing. So now I share the daily readings with both of them by forwarding the day’s readings by email. And have faith that they will read one and it will be the one God directs them to. And it will make all the difference. I share my faith with them when I can and hope it is enough.
So let us not be like Antiochus. Dying in despair. May we instead model ourselves after Paul who, when he was Saul, persecuted early Christians like there was no tomorrow…literally. His regret could have dragged him down and the faith born in Christ’s death would likely have died out. But, as Paul, he was responsible for leading millions, maybe billions, to Christ.
