I do not like sleeping in a completely dark room. There absolutely HAS to be a little light present or I have issues. And not just having trouble sleeping. I get this sense of panic and confinement. Many times I just have to get up in the middle of the night and do something. Usually I work on the computer. Some of my best reflections come at this time of night and from the need to get up out of bed. I once went hiking in a campground at 4 AM because I woke up in the tent in complete blackness and panicked. Now this issue with me is a bit unsettling but it is fairly easily managed with a night lite or just getting up for an hour or so to help me relax a bit.
Then I think about people with real fears and anxiety issues. Who cannot easily manage them with a little light or a stroll thru Mother Nature. What if they walk around with this feeling all or most of the time? I can’t imagine what a person would have to do to manage that situation. There are many things that initiate feelings of dread that promote anxious behavior I assume. Money concerns, job loss or loss in a breakup in a relationship. But considering today is All Soul’s Day, my thoughts naturally drift towards death.
Thanatophobia. The fear of death. Never heard of this condition until I started doing research for today’s reflection. Apparently, I am not the only one unfamiliar with the term. Google spell check doesn’t even recognize it. Had to add it to the dictionary. Thanatophobia (let’s call it T-Phobia for the rest of this reflection) is an intense fear of death to the point of it adversely affecting the normal functioning of your life. It can be associated with fear of losing control, fear of becoming ill or or fear of the unknown. Symptoms can be seen as typical signs of intense anxiety (fatigue, panic attacks, insomnia, nausea, sweating, shortness of breath). I think of my occasional episodes at night while sleeping and magnify it so that it takes over most of your day. I cannot imagine what that may be like.
I remember several years ago riding on my own by motorcycle through Death Valley in California on my BMW. To say I was a bit apprehensive would be an understatement. NOBODY goes to Death Valley voluntarily!! For the record, it is a beautiful place…but stay away from there during the summer months. Hottest place on earth…literally. I happened to be riding there on All Soul’s Day and I recall reading the Psalm for that day. Which one? Why, the 23rd Psalm of course! I read the line:
Even though I walk in the dark valley
I fear no evil; for you are at my side
with your rod and your staff
that give me courage.
My reaction was one of elation. I wanted to share this experience…of being in Death Valley while reading about walking through the dark valley. The thought that I might die in this valley never entered my mind. I was not walking alone. No T-phobia that day. And maybe that is the point. In today’s first reading from the book of Wisdom, the author talks about how the world (the foolish in the reading’s wording) sees death as an affliction. Utter destruction. Something to fear and avoid at all costs. And those that have died are not to be celebrated. For they are now inconsequential. But for those who believe in God sincerely:
they shall be greatly blessed,
because God tried them
and found them worthy of himself.
Paul reassures us in Romans that we have been Baptized into Christ’s death and will therefore share in His resurrection and absolved from sin. Living in eternity. DEATH NO LONGER HAS POWER OVER THAT PERSON. So there is little need to fear death.
Now I am by no means saying that if you are experiencing T-Phobia, and are not a believer in what Christ did for us, you cannot manage this condition by using faith as a prescription. A doctor would not say to you, “take two trips to communion and call me in the morning”. Doesn’t work that way.
What I am saying is that, for the believer who knows in his heart that death is not the end but merely a transition to a new and better life as Christ promised, death does not hold the same sting. Not to say that Christians don’t feel a bit of dread over the uncertainty of how things might play out. That is only natural. But death does not have the power to turn our lives into constant worry over the prospect of dying. This also does not mean that we should embrace or look forward to death. God created life to be lived and lived to its fullest with joy. To build relationship with each other and with Him. Personally I would like to keep the bad boy of death away from my door as long as possible. But when it does come I hope I will dwell on these words from today’s Gospel of John:
For this is the will of my Father,
that everyone who sees the Son and believes in him
may have eternal life,
and I shall raise him on the last day.
Maybe this promise of Christ is a little like that night lite that gets me through the evening. “This little light of mine. I’m gonna let it shine”
