Although it may sound like a pretty cushy calling, I imagine it wasn’t easy to be one of Jesus’ apostles or a charter member of the early Christian movement. Think about it: You join a revolutionary religious organization that enjoys a three-year period of growth, but then your leader is brutally executed for upsetting the political establishment and now it’s up to you – and whoever else is leftover – to carry the message forward even though there is a price on your head. I don’t know about you, but I would be rethinking my choice of vocation and I often wonder if Peter did as well.
When Jesus promised Peter the keys to the Kingdom and said he was the rock upon which He would build His church, he didn’t outline the risks involved or go over all of the possible pitfalls that could befall the first leader of the universal church. And to play fair, Peter didn’t ask. But I would wager that at some point after the resurrection and ascension, Peter had second thoughts about this “promotion.”
After all, Peter wasn’t elected in a secret conclave or heralded with plumes of white smoke. He didn’t celebrate the sacraments in front of a world-wide audience. He was arrested and jailed several times for sharing the good news of Jesus. He didn’t live in a papal apartment or hold court in the Sistine Chapel. He suffered for his faith and only made it to the Vatican as a corpse.
I thought a lot about Peter’s senseless prison stints this week and what it must have been like for him behind bars. It wouldn’t have been a pleasant experience for anyone, but especially not for someone who was merely trying to live his faith without hurting anybody. Was he scared? Did he wonder if he might be killed at any moment? Did he suspect he’d been set up? Even worse…did he feel like giving up?
We all have those moments when things don’t go according to plan and when all hope is lost, we have a choice. We can roll over and let the world walk all over us or we can rise, put on our shoes, and grind through the darkness in order to be vindicated by the light. It’s in those moments of despair that Christ carries us and it is our faith that will see us through. Provided we cling to it like a “rock.”
Today’s readings for Mass: ACTS 12: 1-11; PS 34: 2-3, 4-5, 6-7, 8-9; MT 16: 13-19
