Although what happens in confession should, in theory, stay in confession…I have to tell you about an incident that happened to me during Lent last year. During my obligatory seasonal sacrament, I shared with the priest the myriad of sins I’d committed (and remembered,) those areas of my life I was struggling with, etc…then I buttressed my flaws by saying I’d made good on my promise to be more altruistic during the Lenten season and that I’d refrained from criticizing the actions of a certain elected official, both out loud and online. I was in hopes that my sacrifices and indulgences might balance out a few of my failings or at the very least, shave off a few years of my stint in Purgatory.
“Wait, you promised to do what?” The priest asked, as if he misunderstood what I’d said.
As I repeated the last part of my monologue, the man looked genuinely surprised by my admission. “Wow…and you’ve actually managed to stick with that?” There was a hint of admiration in his voice and I wondered if it could be the Lenten sacrifice that could get me a Fast Pass into Heaven.
“Well yeah, but I gotta tell you…this guy sure isn’t making it easy on me!” I joked.
Let’s face it, praying for your enemies, loving your neighbor as yourself (especially if you don’t particularly get along) and trying to be perfect often feels like a futile endeavor. We may have the best of intentions, but they don’t make it easy and we often wonder if these people wake up every morning looking for ways in which to get on our last nerves.
And it’s not like we ever get a break from them! Have you ever noticed that the class bully is the one kid who never gets sick? Some strange stomach virus could infect nearly every student in school and yet, their immune system can ward off germs as though they are wearing battle armor. At least once a year, you will be forced to sit next to them when the teacher creates a new classroom configuration and those months in which you are the targeted victim (due to your convenient proximity) always feel like eons.
As adults, we discover that the toxic co-worker who drives us up the wall RARELY takes a vacation day. Although they show up late, take long lunches and leave early (expecting you to cover for them, of course) they are still around just long enough each day to make your life miserable. There is always that one neighbor who never cuts their grass, leaves their children’s’ toys laying around the yard or insists on painting their garage a hideous color, and while they may not be our “enemies”…let’s face it, they never make our prayer list unless of course we are praying for them to change schools, get a new job or move away.
The thing is, this is not the kind of praying Christ compels us to do in today’s Gospel. The pursuit of perfect prayer for one’s enemies is not about simply putting them on the list along with those people that we like. Rather it is about seeing them as God sees us: as imperfect beings who deserve unconditional and perfect love. It really is that simple but we make it harder than it has to be.
While it may seem like a huge imposition to love someone who is not as kind as we are, who does not try as hard as we do and who often seems determined to make things difficult for us, but is that not what we ask of God? Do you really think God likes having to sit beside us everyday while we cause constant disruptions in His global classroom? He was good enough to give us free will and more or less stay out of our way, but he can’t avoid us forever. We are the bully on the playground and when we are finished blaming everyone else for our failings, God winds up in our crosshairs. We blame Him for the drama in our lives. We complain to Him when things aren’t working out right and we ask Him to fix it when life isn’t going the way we think that it should.
He watches as we shirk our responsibilities, show up late (if at all) for our weekly appointment with Him, leave right after the meal is served and go through the motions out of habit rather than engagement. And yet, even though we don’t make it easy on Him to want to help us out, we count on Him to be there when we need Him. We expect Him to understand. We expect Him to love us anyway. We expect Him to be perfect.
The perfect love Christ calls us to show one another is not something that can be done begrudgingly or as a sacrifice. There is no reward for doing it. (Ask God if you don’t believe me.) No one is going to hand you a gold star or shave off some of your other sins because you did it. If you do it right, it requires no effort at all. There is no judgment, no assent, or opinion needed. One only has to open their heart and regard the other person, as you want God to regard you.
Today’s Readings for Mass: DT 26:16-19; PS 119: 1-2, 4-5, 7-8; MT 5: 43-48
