Have you ever taken your pain to your spiritual mother, to our Lady of Sorrows? You probably have to one degree or another as most Catholics (and even some non-Catholics on occasion) turn to Mary at some point in their lives. However, admittedly, I have not taken full advantage of the healing she offers. Given that we celebrate the memorial of Our Lady of Sorrows today I guess it’s kind of funny that I ended up this reflection (and last weeks for that matter). I feel Mary is calling me into a deeper relationship with her.
While I do reach out to Mary from time to time, it’s normally a rather “light” conversation. I don’t take the heavy stuff to her – I save that for our Triune God. However, something is changing in my heart and I am experiencing a deeper calling to develop a more profound bond with her – I’m sure it is Mary knocking at the door of my heart. After all, who better to understand our pain than Our Lady of Sorrows? She suffered greatly as she witnessed the suffering of her son. Mary understands our human suffering.
The Blame Game
Often we blame ourselves when we see our children suffer. We focus on our sin and the impact it has on them. Somehow this belief can give us a sense of justification and a reason for the heartache. Thoughts of “it’s my fault” race through our minds as guilt and shame set in. “If I would have only have done it differently…” When we begin to believe we are the blame we lose perspective, and we can lose hope. As such worrisome thoughts enter into our minds we can become stuck in guilt and shame, unable to see beyond and towards real healing and transformation. Personally, being a mother has brought some of the richest moments into my life. As well, motherhood, has also brought shame and guilt in my heart.
Yet Mary was sinless and so was her only son Jesus. So how could she justify her heartache as she witnessed her son suffer so? Well, Mary had four choices. Blame others, blame herself, blame God (therefore blaming her son), or turn to God. Mary knew how much her son loved those who crucified him; therefore, in honor of him she could not blame them. She also knew she was not the blame because her sinless nature dictated this, guilt and shame did not enter into her mother’s heart. And of course, she knew her son, God incarnate, was not the blame. So Mary had only one choice – turn to God for help. And so she did.
The Body of the Crucified Christ
Paul reminds us that we are all part of the Body of Christ (1 Corinthians 12:12-27). Of course Paul wasn’t talking specifically about the physical body of Jesus, rather, he was talking about the Spiritual body of Jesus Christ. However, given that Jesus Christ is fully human and fully God we cannot separate him into two parts. He is not half human and half God, he is fully both. This nature of Jesus Christ is a great mystery, one that our human minds can never understand, yet, our faith invites us into. Given that we are created in the image of God (our Triune God) we too exist in both a human and a divine form – body and spirit. However, we are not fully either one, rather, we are a bit of both.
Reflecting on the fact that Mary is both the mother of Jesus the man and the Theotokos (Mother of God) gives us insight into our relationship with her. Knowing we are part of the body of her son, Jesus Christ, reveals to us that she is also our mother. When Mary loves Jesus, she loves all of him and that includes you and me. While she may not be our physical earthy mother, she is indeed our spiritual mother. In a very real and spiritual way Mary loves us because we are a part of the spiritual body of her son. She carries us in her womb, she holds us in her arms, and she stands by us during our moments of suffering. Her mother’s love, the love of Our Lady of Sorrows, is always present, offering comfort and nurture when we most need it.
Living in Mary
I would argue that just as Jesus’ cells likely lived on in the physical body of Mary through microchimerism (discussed in last Friday’s reflection) we too live on in Mary as well in a spiritual sense. If you may remember microchimerism is a condition where cells of a child continue to live on in the body of a mother for years and maybe even the entire life of the mother. Just as an earthly mother holds her child in her heart and her physical body, Mary holds us in her heart and her spiritual body. We can turn to Mary for help in our heartache, in our guilt, and in our shame. She understands and she loves us because we are part of her son. She knows how to turn to God the Father and she will show us the way to him as well.
Further Understanding Mother Love
Given the impact our relationship with our earthly mother has on our life I have written a bit about this in my blog. Our earthly mother was the first one we loved, and the first person we wanted love from in return. However; sin and heartache entered into the world and sometimes the mother-child relationship suffers as a result. I invite you to read about this first love relationship, the one with our mothers, so you can begin to discover how to more fully love. Here is the link my friends – enjoy: Mother as Nurturer and Comforter
God bless all of you – see you next week Friday! – Carolyn
Sacred Heart of Jesus – have mercy on us.
Father God – consume us.
Holy Spirit – enter in to us.
Our Lady of Sorrows – pray for us.
