The footnote in my weekly missal for today said “A Christian does not grumble.”
I nearly fell off my chair when I read this statement. I am not sure who wrote this but all I hear is grumbling. If only this person would do this or that. I don’t like the color of your tie or the new car you purchased. The news is full of it, our work places are full of it. Neighbors talk of nothing else. We make judgements all the time. We vote. We ask someone to marry us and tell someone else the answer is no. In all this we use words. Take as an example to hardship and patience, brothers and sisters, the prophets who spoke in the name of the Lord. The prophets spoke using the words the Lord put on their hearts. Their words were God’s words. They were not grumbling but expressing God’s frustration with those who will not listen.
But above all, my brothers and sisters, do not swear, either by heaven or by earth or with any other oath, but let your yes mean yes and your no mean no.
Words are so powerful.
Words can heal or hurt.
How do I keep from grumbling?
Now there are times that words must be used for an oath. A government offical will take an oath of office. A man and a woman will take a vow of marriage. There are solemn moments such as this when words are healing. This is what Saint James was speaking. The grumbling part is going to be hard to fix for me. My wife, Anna, says I love to grumble. Words matter between a husband and wife so I have to agree with her. This is to prove that the best advice I had on my wedding day was from an old Southern lawyer. It was free advice, but the absolute best. He said, “You have two choices in your married life and they are ……………..right or happy”.
Jesus says in today’s Gospel, For this reson a man shall leave his father and mother and the two shall become one flesh. One flesh does not mean that either person should be abused. Spousal abuse is not part of the marriage vow. When there is abuse the words spoken in the marriage ceremony by the husband or wife are lies. One means equal parts in a union going forward. Jesus was speaking of the importance of a vow and that the words should be lived. Abuse means that someone did not mean yes. God does not want this.
The importance of today’s readings are four fold. First, we need to be careful when we speak. There are consequences to our words. I have been falsely accused once in my life and it hurt. It all turned out well but the hurt was still there. Second, when we swear or take an oath it is a solemn occasion and should only be taken when our yes means yes. Thirdly, words do matter. We have not discussed gossip today but what we say to others and about others matters greatly. Fourthly, we are not in a judgement seat. We have opinions but that doesn’t mean we are right or that the other person is wrong. God is in charge and we are not.
My mother-in-law, Rita, would always tell my wife, “If you don’t have anything good to say, don’t say anything at all.” It must be Irish but I remember my grandmother. Blanche saying something along the same lines.
My wife will witness if I can cease all my grumbling. This might be the positive thing I do for Lent starting next week. The message today is that only Jesus is in the judgement seat and I am not. The prospect of having less to complain about is appealing.
Words are important. Grumblings are not.
God Love You Always
Bob Burford
PS: Please continue to pray for all Cancer patients and their caregivers. Also continue to pray for the people of the Ukraine and peace with Russia.
Picture Credit: “Word on the Street: Newsstand on a street corner in Los Angeles, California. April 1942.” by polkbritton is licensed under
