Eight-year old Tommy runs to his mother crying. “Freddie just hit me.” A fight between Tommy and his ten-year old brother ended when Freddie punched his little brother. We know the conversation that follows. “Why did you hit your brother?” “Because he took my truck and wouldn’t give it back.” “And why did you take his truck, Tommy?” “He wasn’t playing with it.” “Yes, I was!”
And so mothers try to resolve issues between their children. They have to plow their way through the “blame game” until someone finally says their sorry. Who’s to blame? Both the boys; they both played a part. Sometimes parents have to punish the children for a time until they let go of their grudges and reconcile.
What the boys do not realize is that their fighting hurt their mother as well. Any parent will tell you how distressing it is to have two of their beloved children at odds with each other. The mother’s heart may hurt more than her boys’ feelings.
Today we listen to Jesus teach his disciples about prayer. He walks them through what we call the “Our Father.” At the heart of the prayer are the words, “Forgive us.” Judging from Jesus’ comment at the end, the “forgiveness” part was what concerned him most (Matthew 6:7-15).
“This is how you are to pray: Our Father…forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us…”
Going back to our story, imagine the two little boys reconciling, and big brother, Freddie, grabbing his younger brothers hand and saying , “Let’s go into the kitchen and ask Mommy to forgive us. Did you notice the tears in her eyes and the pain on her face when she talked with us? When we fight it hurts her feelings.” Like the two boys we walk together into God’s kitchen and say “forgive us.” He asks us if we’ve settled things with each other before he says “I forgive you.”
Jesus added a big “IF” to his words:
“If you forgive men their transgressions, your heavenly Father will forgive you. But if you do not forgive men, neither will your Father forgive your transgressions.”
What God wants to give each of us more than anything else is his unconditional forgiveness. This is the gift that Jesus bought for us on the cross. It is the one gift that everyone needs, and none of us deserves—even those who are “good people” and have few sins to confess. As much as God longs to forgive us no matter what we’ve done, his heart is restricted to the degree that we will not forgive one another. His anguish of heart cannot be relieved until he sees us make a move to forgive one another.
Marriage counselors testify to the fact that the healing of a damaged relationship begins with efforts to forgive. When we forgive we open a new door into our damaged heart, and thus give God permission to rush in with his mercy and his grace.
Which takes us back to our “marital covenant” with God. We want to get closer to him; we want to have hearts that are able to hear his voice; we want to have a breakthrough in our relationship with him. Where do we start? We do as Jesus says and say “Forgive us.” And then we add, “As best I can, at this moment in my life, I forgive ____(whoever comes to mind) and ask you to bless him (her) with the same abundance that I want for myself.”
“I sought the Lord, and he answered me” (Ps 34:5).
