(Romans 12: 5-16; Psalm 131: 1-3; Luke 14: 15-24)
What were the “House Rules” in your house growing up? House rules are the standards of behavior for people who live in a family together. They may be clearly spoken and hanging in a list on the refrigerator (No snacks if you didn’t eat all your food at the table; don’t interrupt; do your homework before you watch TV) or they may be unnamed, but clearly followed, ways of being with each other as family (when anyone comes home, everyone goes to the door to meet him; don’t bother Dad when he’s watching the news; babies take priority).
Today’s first reading could be called “House Rules for the Kingdom of God.” St. Paul has explained much of the theology of Christianity of the first century in the preceding chapters of Romans. Now he moves into an exhortation that describes how Christians behave with each other. He creates a veritable checklist of practical ways to live out “love one another as I have loved you,” or, as St. Paul puts it, habits for living as “one Body in Christ and individually parts of one another.”
Let’s review St. Paul’s 12 House Rules for a Christian home—or Christian community:
Use the gifts (charisms, talents, skills) God has given you for the good of all.
Let love be sincere.
Hate what is evil; hold on to what is good.
Express mutual affection.
Be the first to show respect and deference to each other.
Do not grow slack in zeal, be fervent in spirit, serve the Lord.
Rejoice in hope, endure in affliction, persevere in prayer.
Be generous and hospitable.
Bless, rather than curse, those who are unkind or even persecuting to you.
Be empathic: rejoice with those who rejoice; cry with those who are sad.
Exercise equality in the way you treat all.
Do not be haughty but associate with the lowly.
My experience as a family therapist supports that these are indeed family rules which lead to fruits of the Spirit: love, peace, joy, patience, goodness, kindness, gentleness, faithfulness, self-control. (Galatians 5:22)
Conduct a little experiment in your mind. Think of a difficult relationship you have. How many of those 12 House Rules does the other person practice? How many of those 12 House Rules do you practice with that person?
Now think of a caring, comfortable relationship you have. How many of St. Paul’s House Rules does that other person practice? How many of them do you practice in that relationship?
Perhaps of special interest is the list that begins “Since we have gifts that differ according to the grace given to us…” What does St. Paul mean by that? When we are baptized and confirmented, each of us is given charisms, special gifts meant to be used within the Christian community. These are our charisms. We may think of charisms as relatively rare gifts, such as preaching (exhortation) or discernment of spirits or speaking in tongues or healing. Those charisms are among us—and are a bit unusual. But ALL of us have our own ways of building up the Kingdom of God. St. Paul today mentions several more common charisms: teaching, ministering (serving others), contributing, supervising, and doing works of mercy. What are the charisms which God has given you?
Part of living in God’s Kingdom is like living in a loving family: each person develops into an individual, even while he or she also forms a part of the whole which is more than the sum of its parts. It is good—and very important—that each of us identify our gifts and work through them.
I am especially fascinated by how this reading begins: “We, though many, are one Body in Christ and individually parts of one another.” Individually parts of one another? What does that mean? I think it means that in the Kingdom of God we are meant to fit together, like a patchwork quilt or jigsaw puzzle. We are meant to help each other grow in holiness—probably sometimes by rubbing against each other, as is true in a family. We are meant to work cooperatively to create something bigger and better than what is possible for any of us to create alone. We discover our own truths by letting ourselves be ourselves in the presence of each other. We bend and bow, give up, give out, and give in. As we do, we grow in our ability to obey God’s House Rules–and our ability to build the Kingdom.
From whatever motley crew we are, God builds His Kingdom within and among us. It works better when we follow the House Rules. So, today St. Paul gives them to us—to hang on our refrigerator and plant in our heart.
Prayer:
Lord, which of those House Rules are most important for me today? Where is my rubbing against my Christian brothers or sisters giving me Your message that I need to grow closer to Your standards? Where will I feel Your Love today through someone who is living by Your House Rules? Let me be open to consider these questions in Your Presence, responding to Your Spirit. Thank you for Your guidance that teaches me to love as You love. Amen.
